Tuesday, July 12, 2011

Baby Steps and Pendants of Grace

     I took a baby step in my path to a nursing degree and then my midwifery degree (hopefully). I had the volunteer orientation at Feel Better Hospital in Big City today. Not too exciting or eventful, but necessary and the cafeteria food is tasty (they have diet Coke from the fountain, too!!!). It was the 2nd step on this path toward my new season of life and my career pursuit. Volunteering will not only look fabulous on nursing school applications, it will expose me to the hospital side of childbirth and put me into contact with nurses, midwives, and doctors who can guide, inform, and encourage me in my career ambitions. I'm putting myself in a great location and when all is said and done, so much about where you end up is who you know; "networking."
     Tomorrow I start with my first of four weeks at the Information Desk. I will then try out to the NICU "Cuddling" position where I get to hold preemies who need a loving, human touch. I'm also heading toward the Labor and Delivery Concierge where I get visitors refreshments, information, and ? etc. Both will be great spots to serve in. Perhaps I'll alternate between both positions. I'll see how everything unfolds.
     Tomorrow is Julia's 3rd birthday. That girl is a real kicker - literally! My Dad called her "irrepressible" and it is too true. She's really animated and fun. In her speech-delayed language, she plays with her dolls and acts out all sorts of scenarios that I don't quite understand. Yesterday she was making one of her dolls cry and it was hilarious.
My sweet and sassy Julia
     July 13th also brings back memories of her birth. In a sense, her birthday is also an anniversary of sorts. I feel relief that I'm three years away from that event that catapulted me into an inexplicably long season of grief, heartache, trauma, and just being a total mess. I think it was over 2  years before I began to feel more normal again. I will never be the same, however, but I think that the changes that have occurred in my heart, thinking, maturity and character are all profoundly good. God uses all things for his glory and simply put, I needed to be broken and put back together in a new, fresh, stronger way. Curiously enough, my scars have sort of become pendants of grace and strength. With all that I went through and experienced, I feel almost unmovable. Any tragedy that might come my way I feel totally prepared to handle. But God knows what the future holds and he is faithful.
     I'm revisiting that post I wrote regarding what I wished would've happened the morning Julia was born. http://childbirthcheerleader.blogspot.com/2010/09/writing-activity-to-help-with-closure.html and  http://halfdozengirls.blogspot.com/2011/02/curious-mystery.html That story intrigues me, but I am confident that all that happened was carefully orchestrated to bring about the course of life I'm on right now. I feel God's peace and pleasure in this season of my life so clearly. Thank you, Lord.